Financial abundance

January has been a big month of reflection for me.

I did the 13 Wishes ritual over the christmas break, writing down 13 things I wanted to call in for the year, burning one each day, and letting the final one remain as my core intention.

What stayed was: financial abundance.

I don’t usually let myself wish for this. Wanting money has long felt selfish, greedy, or misaligned for me and even as I write this, I can feel a tight, uncomfortable sensation in my body. I’m letting that be there, alongside a deeper truth: a longing for stability, enoughness, and safety. An understanding that to live an aligned life and to sustain something like Giddy Garden, there are real, practical things that need to be paid for.

I’m slowly getting better at talking about money. About needing it. About asking for support. And I’m realising that financial abundance doesn’t have to be in opposition to values, creativity, or care in fact, it’s what allows those things to survive and flourish.

Through doing money work, I’ve started to notice some of the stories and patterns I’ve carried:

🌱 That being paid well means working hard at things you don’t enjoy.

🌱 I grew up with chore charts and comparisons that left me feeling ashamed of “earning less.”

🌱 Early jobs were done out of necessity, teaching me that making money had to be boring.

🌱 In my early adult years as soon as I would earn money I would spend it impulsively (on things that weren't important to me), followed by guilt.

🌱 I stayed in jobs long after I was unhappy because leaving felt lazy or inadequate.

🌱 I chose careers to please others, not myself.

🌱 I have undervalued creative work because “it’s fun, so it shouldn’t pay well.”

🌱 I grew up around scarcity thinking, even when there was more than enough, and have carried that thinking with me.

🌱 I would hand financial control to partners and feel powerless.

🌱 I would take the “easy” jobs because I didn’t believe I was qualified for more and had a lack of belief in myself.

There’s a lot there. And I’m gently, imperfectly unpacking it.

If Giddy Garden is going to survive and become the arts and wellness home we dream of, we need more financial support and I’m learning to say that without shame.

And for you, if this resonates, I’ll leave you with a few journaling questions:

🌷 What are your earliest memories around money?

🌷 What patterns or behaviours do you notice in how you earn, spend, save, or avoid money?

🌷 What sensations or emotions show up in your body when you think about money?

🌷 What does abundance mean to you, in wealth, health, creativity, play, or rest?

🌷 What are the things in your life that you love spending money on, the things that make you feel alive?

This year, I’m choosing to keep looking at this gently, bravely, and with curiosity and build a beautiful relationship with money, having financial abundance and stability.