Learning to Receive

I used to think the only way people would stay in my life was if I kept over-giving. To always put in the effort, to hold on tightly to the relationship, even if it meant ignoring my own needs.

Looking back, I can see how much of that was just me people-pleasing, rejecting myself, abandoning myself, trying to earn love instead of trusting I deserved it. Only recently have I started voicing more of what I actually need. Telling people how they can support me and what I need to feel loved and valued. Allowing myself to receive care (something I didn’t even realise I struggled with, because I thought I had to do everything myself).

And wow, the difference is huge. When I’ve asked, people have shown up. When I’ve opened, support has poured in. I’m learning to lean into that, to let myself be held, and it feels softer, easier, more balanced than the way I used to do things.

On the flip side, I also love when people tell me how they want to be supported. That feels like the healthiest way to give, not from people-pleasing, but from an authentic place where care flows both ways.